This one’s a little different from my usual posts. Yesterday, I had one of those moments that completely caught me off guard: a clothes swap box. And it happened in the last place I would have expected.
As I was leaving the bathroom at work, I passed our break room. We’ve got this little corner that’s basically a “free, take it!” zone. People leave books, fresh vegetables from their gardens, random knickknacks—anything they want to give away.
Yesterday, there was a box. I couldn’t see what was inside from where I was standing, but my curiosity won out. I walked over, peeked inside, and I’m so glad I did.
An Unexpected Clothes Swap at Work
Inside was a stunning golden sequin gown—absolutely gorgeous—and two wigs. One was a warm strawberry blonde, the other a deep blue-black shade. (Hair experts probably have fancier names for them, but you get the idea.)
It hit me harder than I expected. There was happiness, of course. Surprise. But also a little guilt.
Why This Felt Personal
Lately, I’ve been craving something more elegant in my wardrobe. I’ve seen friends—like Kandi from Kandi’s Land—absolutely glowing in formal dresses, and it’s made me want one for myself. But between the stress of shopping in public and the risk of buying the wrong size online, I’ve been putting it off.
I’ve also been debating getting a good wig while my own hair grows out of its awkward phase. And here, in a random box in the break room, were two of the exact things I’d been quietly wanting.
My Internal Moment of Hesitation
I didn’t just grab them and run. I stood there for a moment, having a full conversation in my head. Do I take the whole box? Just one thing? What will people think if they see me? Was it even meant for someone like me?
There’s still guilt I carry about being transgender—like I’m taking something that “should” belong to a cis woman. But in the end, I picked up the box, took it back to my desk, and figured I could always put it back later if I changed my mind.
All the Questions the Clothes Swap Sparked
I couldn’t stop thinking about that box. Who did it belong to? Why did they give these things away? Would the dress fit? How would I look in the wigs? How do I even care for wigs?
The questions swirled in my head all day. And mixed in with all of that was the realization that someone had just given away a set of items that couldn’t have been cheap. That kind of generosity is rare—and powerful.
The Generosity Factor
It made me think about my own journey. I’ve bought plenty of clothes that didn’t fit quite right, or just didn’t feel like “me” once I tried them on. Most of them are still tucked away somewhere, unused.
Maybe instead of letting them sit, I could give them away. Maybe I could be that source of unexpected joy for someone else.
Looking for More Clothes Swap Events Near Me
It also planted a new thought: I need to find more clothes swaps. I’ve read about them online, but I’ve never been to one. I’m not even sure we have any locally. And if we do, there’s that creeping anxiety that I don’t belong—that if I show up, people will think I’m not “meant” to be there.
Even at a transgender-specific event, I worry I’d feel like an imposter. But after yesterday, I can’t shake the idea of trying. Maybe in the next few weeks, I’ll start looking.
Trying On the Dress
That night, I couldn’t resist. I tried on the golden sequin gown—just enough to see if it even came close to fitting. I didn’t want to keep something like that if it didn’t. And surprisingly, it fit me quite well. Later this week, I want to try it again with the full look: hair, makeup, breastforms, the works. But even that initial try-on was a boost.
I haven’t had the chance to try the wigs yet, but they’re ready and waiting for their moment.
Closing Thoughts on the Clothes Swap
This little surprise clothes swap at work reminded me how powerful small acts of generosity can be—and how much joy they can spark in unexpected ways. It’s got me thinking about giving back, about putting myself out there more, and about finding more opportunities like this.
And to whoever left that box—you have no idea how much it meant to me. Whether it was a simple clean-out or an intentional act of kindness, you made my day. I just hope that whatever tickets of yours I end up working on, I handle them with enough skill and care to repay that kindness.
Have you ever been to a clothes swap? Would you go to one if you could? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments.
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